Dec 1, 2010

Posted by in Emotions, Lifestyle | 4 Comments

Understanding the Deadly Force of Unforgiveness

Everyone often gets the opportunity to be mistreated, hurt, annoyed but what you do afterwards is what matters. Life is too short to allow this deadly force called unforgiveness to ruin it for you. “The hatred you’re carrying is a live coal in your heart – far more damaging to yourself than to them” Lawana Blackwell

To err is human; to forgive is divine, they say. But we have been given the power to forgive. The power of forgiveness is awesome because of the immense benefits to the one who forgives. It is all about what you want in life and how far you want to go. Unforgiveness is a force that has the power to influence, affect or control you and your future negatively.

When a person understands the effect of this deadly force, a red light flashes on the heart when unforgiveness comes knocking on the door. This force is so deadly that it has ruined many relationships, careers, businesses, led many to their sick beds and many to their early graves.

Why you must resist unforgiveness

  • It gives your offender the power to hurt you-Any time you remember the offence or see the person or even hear his/her name mentioned, you will get angry or be emotionally worked up. And if the offender is aware of this effect on you and he is a bad one, he may choose to add to the injury with more offences.
  • Your health is affected-When your anger is boiling; it increases your heartbeat, tightens your muscles, and causes aches and pains. And may lead to more serious medical issues if not checked on time.
  • Reduces your ability to focus-Unforgiveness has the power to disrupt the harmony of the brain waves, making you less able to focus and think clearly. This can lead to poor decision making, which is not good for your future!
  • It impedes your progress in life-When you are holding down someone, you too will go nowhere. This is the case with this deadly force. When you hold someone down in your heart, you are actually imprisoning yourself too.
  • It plants a seed of what you hate-A seed planted will produce fruit after sometime. Unforgiveness harboured within you will grow to produce same in you. You will find yourself doing exactly the very thing that was done to you (that you hated) to someone else.

This deadly force drains your energy, wastes your time for more profitable ventures. Unforgivenes shows you are weak because forgiveness is the attribute of the strong. Embrace the power of forgiveness and avoid the effects of this deadly force. Why give yourself all the stress for something or somebody that is not worth it.

Furthermore, the scriptures tell us to forgive if we want to be forgiven by our heavenly father. Matt 6:15, Matt 18:35, Luke 6:37, etc. Besides we are to be like Christ who forgave us our sins while we yet disobeying the commands of God. Romans 5:8, Act 5:31

“It really doesn’t matter if the person who hurt you deserves to be forgiven. Forgiveness is a gift you give yourself. You have things to do and you want to move on.” Real Live Preacher

What other reasons do you have for resisting unforgiveness?


Ifeoma nwoke


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  1. One thing I think about that helps me to forgive is that Christ forgave me so much. He has shown me such measure of patience that it encourages me to forgive.

    Besides if we want God to answer our prayers, we ought to forgive.

    Thanks for the article.

  2. How do you do it is my question? i know all the benefits and the reasons but how do you really forgive and forget?

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